rules to live by.

i know some of you (those whose hearts have not been hardened by four years of medical school) are chomping at the bit to hear about the hospital. all in due time, my little grasshoppers. i've tried to write a few posts that encompass all of the aspects of the hospital, but it's just too much. so for today, we will start with signage.

i must first point out that the hospital is, in general, chaos. patients are in big old wards with upwards of 90 patients, which is clearly above capacity given that there are often people lying on floor mats in the aisles. their families are all in bed with them. the hallways, which are more like open-air porches, are packed with more waiting families, who apparently sleep there overnight, as well as stray dogs and pigeons. yesterday, on rounds, i heard a meowing sound and looked over to see a feral cat wandering amongst the patients. jcaho* would have a field day.

so, with all this chaos, how does one know how to comport oneself?
handy instructional signs! these are a source of of neverending amusement to us. i will highlight two of my favorites. first, this one.


should i just open my tiffin** and bisleri*** and eat lunch on the floor in the hallway? let me check the sign. X! you should not do this. instead, you should head to the canteen. i hear if you are a westerner, you should not, in fact, head to the canteen as you will regret this for the rest of your trip. however, the non-indian population consists of us, one other american, and two hardy-looking swiss students, so in general this strategy works.

next, with so many patients, how will we ever get in to see the doctor? waiting in line takes so long... perhaps that guard could "help us out". X! do not attempt to exchange money with the man in the khaki uniform. this is frowned upon (although perhaps not by the guards).


others include vigorous red check marks next to photos of a man tossing his trash and spitting appropriately into the trash bins, as well as one we can't figure out which seems to condemn both sitting on patients' beds and standing around them. unclear what the appropriate action is. although i can't speak about the illicit exchange of money, i do have to vouch for the fact that most of these signs go unheeded, but it's a nice thought.



p.s. happy easter to those celebrating it!

*joint commission for accreditation of healthcare organizations
**metal lunch tin
*** indian bottled water